“If you can’t do it right, don’t do it at all.”
That’s the adage I was taught when I was younger. Now, being the black-and-white person that I am (especially when I was younger), I re-worded this as “If you can’t do it right the first time, don’t do it at all.” I didn’t feel like I could fail. Not only that, but I tried everything in my power to dot all the i’s and cross all the t’s, even if they only semi-related to what I was doing.
Overcoming my fear of failure has been quite a challenge, especially as it is a signature part of entrepreneurship. The first time I heard, “Fail safe, fail fast” I was stunned. FAIL? You can’t fail! Are you kidding? Just imagine my surprise hearing VentureLab described as a “Fail-Safe Zone.” Where in the world is it safe to fail?
Ultimately, it goes back to my identity being founded in the LORD, rather than in what I do. I need to remember that no matter what happens in this life, “Christ has overcome the world” (John 16:33). There really is a difference between the “real me” and the “role me.”
In David Mattson’s adapted book of sales rules developed by David H. Sandler, he describes the difference between the two as “your self-identity” and “your performance in a role” (Mattson, 14). He goes on to say “…failure is not a reflection of the REAL-you, only the ROLE-you. These failures are nothing more than an indication that there is room for improvement in your ‘salesperson skills’” (Ibid). I think this principle can be applied to all roles in life, not just sales. But in sales particularly, it’s important to remember that just because a lot of people have told you “no” does not mean that you are a reject. Whether pitching an idea, cold calling, or entering into a business plan competition failure is bound to follow at some points. But you or your idea failing is not a reflection on the “real you” – it’s a challenge for the “role you” to take on and learn from.
I hope my children learn to see failure as a part of life and stepping stones in the learning experience. I hope they learn to embrace it as a challenge, rather than have the fear of failure permeate their being. They are first and foremost God’s child, “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 149:14) – that is who they really are, and so are you.
BoweryJE22
Thank you for this encouraging and realistic advice! I also grew up with a similar montage: “Good enough never is.” This imbued a feeling of failure in anything I did, since I was seeking an unattainable level of perfection. Understanding where one’s true identity rests and separating that from earthly failures can be incredibly helpful for all areas of life, including business!
This rings so true. When we understand that our identity is truly rooted in Christ it doesn’t really matter whether we succeed or fail. We are not defined by our circumstances but by what Christ says about us. He says we are redeemed, sanctified, set free, conquerors, co-heirs, etc. I wonder what sales and the rest of life would look like if we really believed we are who Christ says we are?