Tell me if this sounds familiar: you’re talking to somebody, they say something interesting that reminds you of something, you start thinking about what you want to say about that, and – oops they just asked a question about what they just said, and you don’t have an answer. Typically this is when we bring out the “yeah…” and chuckle awkwardly. Not the most winning conversational technique. This is a problem for good communication, but it’s even worse in sales.
The purpose of a question is to gain information. Simple and obvious, I know. Our problem is that all too often, we spend our time thinking about what we want to say, instead of listening to the answers. When we sell, we desperately need the information, the answers, that our questions are drawing out. If we are devoting our mental space to our own words, we will never retain the information we’re after, defeating the point of asking questions in the first place.
This is where the advice to ask your question and shut up should be expanded on. It does mean to stop talking once you’ve asked, but it means even more than that. When we shut up, we should shut up mentally too. The important point isn’t the next bullet point on our sales pitch, but what the prospect needs. If we turn off our physical voice but keep on with our internal voice, we fail to act in accordance with the situation and might as well be singing opera instead of having a sales conversation.
BoweryJE22
This is such a reoccurring problem, and I wish I could say that it has only happened to me a few times, but honestly it happens ALL the time. Listening is such an underrated thing and we as humans always try to talk before we listen, and that is something that we all need to work on. Great post!
So true! I think often we’re so busy thinking about what we’re going to respond with that we aren’t actually listening to what the other person is saying. I like how you talked about shutting up both our external voice and our internal voice. It’s much easier for me to stop talking and keep thinking, but this is a great thing to keep in mind!
Good point about shutting off mentally as well as verbally. Removing the internal dialogue can be a challenge especially when you want to think of the next thing to say to avoid any awkward pauses. Hopefully the ability to listen becomes more common within the world of sales.
Great post! I am definitely bad at shutting off my internal voice. All the time while calling at the calling center, I would find myself thinking about what to say next, rather than focusing on the moment and what the alumni were saying. This post is a great reminder to not just stop talking, but to truly focus on what the prospect is trying to say.